Wednesday, August 24, 2011

crossroads



So the plan was to come to Asia, travel a while and then to go to South Korea to teach English. I'm a big believer in signs and there being some kind of path already written for me. I think it's certainly possible to deviate from this path and to take things into your own hands. But, for me, it seems I get an overwhelming sense of peace when I realign with it; whenever I trust in this universe enough to let things fall into place.

I met two wonderful guys when I was in Singapore and ended up joining them on most of their adventure through KL, Cambodia Vietnam and Thailand. They were both so much fun and we were a perfect fit together. I was fond of one of the guys and we became close. Saying goodbye to him was one of the hardest things I've had to do: it felt really unnatural. For whatever reason, Korea has not worked out. If it had gone to plan, I would not have been able to join the lads for their trip to Thailand and my heart would still be rigid and entirely selfish.

I've lost the momentum and the desire to be in Korea now. So, with much consideration, I've come up with an alternative. Being an au pair in Europe is something I've wanted to do for many years, although I honestly had not anticipated doing it so soon. I've been in touch with seven lovely families in or near Prague and I'm just sorting through now trying to see who would be a good match for me. According to my recruitment agency going to Korea now is still an option and I could get my contract any day now, but I'm not excited. I've made it clear to each of the families that I'd like to have a four month contract, potentially extendable if I prefer it over applying for the Jan/Feb intake in SK.

It's all very sudden, but it feels right. I don't believe I'm considering moving to Prague to be with this guy; I'm not interested in putting that much strain and pressure on our friendship. While we were hanging out I was quite frustrated that things could not progress naturally because there was always a limitation. Moving to Prague is as much about me exploring a little part of Europe as it is letting his and my friendship develop however it will. I've done a lot of soul searching these past two days and I can confidently say if nothing comes of it, I wont be disappointed; I'll be glad I got to test things out.

It's crazy (but super cool) to think I could be living in Europe in a month! I feel like I'm really living; I'm listening to my soul and feeding it whatever it craves. This is good.

3 comments:

Sonja said...

I just found your blog through Meg's (wild and wily..) comments. Your photos are so gorgeous! I was too distracted by your photos and your profile description (because I too am obsessed with the world and chocolate :o) but then I noticed this post! You're going! you're going to Europe!? This will be very exciting to follow!!! :o)
Good Luck!

Sladjana said...

wow!u are really living a life! :)
just so you know europe is one lovely place to live!go girl! :)
amazing photos!

xo
-S

Emily said...

I'm so glad you are going! Yay!